As a woman there are certain things you deal with. You don’t ask for them, they’re just a fact of life. It has nothing to do with beauty or body type. The only real requirement is that you be feminine, which by definition, if you are a woman, you are.
Street harassment is one of those things. You walk outside, you don’t have in ear buds, random men will try to engage you in personal conversations. They’ll comment on your looks, tell you what to do, make suggestions on your behavior, present, past and future, tender their opinion about your clothes or walk or hair or skin or lips.
Unless you’re a woman you won’t understand how invasive and annoying it can be, this unasked for, completely random inquisition and abuse. Continue reading “The Reality of Street Harassment #gender #catcalling #equality”
I’m convinced that perception is half the reason progress in diversity-related matters is yo-yo slow. How those in power look at you, their unspoken but powerful judgments, they’re like microinequities on steroids.
Even when you try to do something good, if you’re a minority, something bad will appear and follow you like a bad smell. Take Rachel Feintzeig’s recent piece “Women Penalized for Promoting Women, Study Finds” for instance.
In it Feintzeig talks about new research from the University of Colorado that found women and non-white executives who advocate for other minorities to be promoted or hired often get lower performance ratings than white males who do the same thing. Why? Perception. Continue reading “Perception is the Devil; Women Penalized for Promoting Women @WSJ #diversity #inclusion”
Ladies, did you know if you marry your baby’s daddy you can save yourself from male violence? Me neither.
But earlier this week Bradford Wilcox and Robin Fretwell Wilson published a piece in the Washington Post titled “One Way to End Violence? Stop Taking Lovers and Get Married.”
Yeah, that’s what I thought when I first read it too. It’s crazy. It’s short-sighted. It’s almost criminal in a way because if even one person absorbs this idea, it could be dangerous. Even scarier, most of the argument is paper thin. Continue reading “Just Marry! Who? Anybody! #gender #marriage”
Growing up I always knew that being black might cause problems for me. But it was only after I was an adult that I realized how many problems being a woman would cause.
Luckily, I’ve never been physically abused, nor have I been targeted by a mass-murdering virgin with an ax to grind, but hatred for women — in its various iterations and degrees — is pervasive around the world.
So when a man — whether he’s deranged or not — feels that it’s perfectly in order for him to kill women, who he views as inferior beings who rejected him but to whom he is nonetheless entitled — it’s baffling to me how anyone could argue that misogyny and its effect on our culture is not an issue. Continue reading “Misogyny: The Big, Pink Elephant #ElliotRodger #gender”
I often wonder whether it was the rich or the poor who first gave money a bad name.
The rich would have reason to do so because, duh, they want to remain rich. Thus, poo pooing money would make it seem less enticing for those who might have the resources and/or the wherewithal to take it from them. The poor might deny money’s appeal because they don’t have it – a simple case of denying what you really want.
Of course, it’s all BS.
There’s a line I’ll never forget from cult 90s film classic Reality Bites where Winona Ryder very snidely says to Ethan Hawke, “Oh, but what’s money to an artist? To a philosopher? It’s just green-colored paper that floats in and out of his life like snow!” She was basically calling him an immature idiot, and I agree. People need money. Period. What you do with it and how you live with it, is something else. Continue reading “Ladies, Let’s Talk About Cash #payequity #diversity #money #gender #discrimination”
Okay, so a friend hipped me to Lily Allen’s new single “Hard Out Here.” I watched the video because my buddy gushed over Allen’s supposed statement for the piece, one of empowerment and a kind of middle finger to the music industry for trying to force women into skinny, cookie cutter molds.
I get that, in theory. Allen said the video was intended as a light-hearted commentary on the objectification of women in modern pop culture. I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt that she meant well. But the trick is, to understand someone actually has to listen to, and think about, her lyrics. If you don’t, and you just look at the video – which I’m afraid is what usually happens with a lot of pop music videos – you don’t get the point.
Without those lyrics – and really, who’s going to be listening when those glorious brown bums are defying gravity and having liquids poured over them – essentially she’s doing the same thing as other music artists who feature a preponderance of scantily clad, overly sexualized women – she’s using them to get attention. Continue reading “Dear Lily Allen: Point Not Well Made”
A colleague passed along this video, and man is it powerful. In less than four minutes this young woman nails one of the main issues that contribute to women’s problems in the workplace: our inherited insistence on making ourselves smaller and less visible. It’s a poem, and I’m not a poetry fan, but this young woman’s … Continue reading Poetic Justice – Women are taught to absorb. Men to emit… #diversity
Author and self-help guru Iyanla Vanzant is in the news over comments she made in an interview with MadameNoire Magazine.
Vanzant had the temerity to suggest that women, black women in particular, are “out of order.” One pearls she offers: “There is no reason for us to continue to have children with men who don’t honor us, and don’t take care of their children.”
I agree whole heartedly. Vanzant hit the nail on the head when she talked about women giving reign over their lives to people who make them spiritually, emotionally and mentally sick.
To me, her words are not harsh, they’re fair, and she’s not passing judgment so much as she is pointing out a truth as she sees it. And sometimes the truth hurts. Continue reading “#Women Are Out of Order”